Courtney Burkholder

I don’t know if there are any Christmas vacation fans out there, but I’m betting there are. I’m not talking about taking a fabulous trip over the holidays – we’re all fans of that! I’m talking about the Chevy Chase movie, “Christmas Vacation.” In my family, it’s considered a classic; right up there with “It’s a Wonderful Life” and “A Christmas Carol.” And I have to admit, I’m a bit of a Clark Griswald when it comes to Christmas.

Like Clark, from the moment the Thanksgiving dishes are done, I’m thinking about Christmas. I’m planning the menu and inviting our families. I’m decorating and shopping and painstakingly considering each and every gift I purchase. I’m anticipating the children’s expressions as they open each package and remembering my favorite Christmases as a child. Throughout the month of December, my single goal is to make Christmas for my family magical and special – just like is was for me as a child. And I worry. What if it’s not absolutely perfect?

So I called the guru of magical Christmases. My mother. “How did you do it, Mom? How did you make sure every Christmas was so perfect?”

My mother screamed with laughter. “Perfect? Is that how you remember them?”

Of course that’s how I remembered them. Magical, happy…and perfect.

“Don’t you remember the time I forgot to turn on the oven, and the turkey was still frozen, and we had 20 guests to feed?” she asked.

I had a hazy recollection of that.

“How about the year your brother’s crazy friend showed up on Christmas eve to ‘hang out’ and ruined our plans, and we got into a huge fight? Remember that?”

Well, vaguely.

“And then there was the year your Dad gave me a crock pot for Christmas, and I didn’t speak to him for the rest of the day. Or when your cousin pushed your new doll carriage down the stairs and broke two of the wheels off.”

The list of Christmas debacles went on and on. Red wine spilled on white carpet by an intoxicated relative, Christmas lights that didn’t work and extensive cursing that followed, family arguments, tears, pouting, broken toys, a fender-bender.

Wow. How had I even survived Christmas at my house?

The point is, it’s easy to let our expectations of the holidays get the better of us. We feel pressure to make the holidays perfect for everyone. We remember our own Christmases through rose-colored glasses, when in truth, they were filled with the same insanity that occurs when all large families gather together. No holiday is perfect. There will be burnt green bean casserole in the center of your holiday feast, so to speak, at every holiday. That’s okay. Chalk it up to a great Christmas memory to laugh about later.

That’s what Mom and I did. Some of the stories I hadn’t thought of in years, and we had a good laugh reminiscing. And I think it was cathartic for mother to know I hadn’t been permanently scarred by the Christmas drama, and a good lesson for me to learn, as well.

So, this year, give yourself a break. You have my permission to make a few mistakes along the way in your journey toward that perfect Griswald Family Christmas.